Christmas is nearly upon us, and what better way to celebrate than to whip out a favourite (yet increasingly rare) segment in which I trawl through the paranormal rubbish on YouTube so you don't have to! So rare was the segment that it was only ever posted on the (now dead) parent blog and never transferred across to this one.
To refresh your memory (or to recap for those that never got to read them the first time around), we explored The Paranormal, According to YouTube, More of the Paranormal, According to YouTube, Conspiracies, According to YouTube, and then finally Even More of the Paranormal, According to youTube. And now, after what seems like years, the segment is reborn here on a blog that is updated on a semi-regular basis because I've actually got the time again to trawl through the endless hours of YouTube trash for the few ounces of comedy gold. Admittedly, though, there is so much unintentional hilarity on that site that I only had to spend about an hour browsing around before I had a wealth of new material.
We'll be revisiting two of the tried and true categories in the form of ghosts and the extra-terrestrial. After that, we'll be going where we've never gone before: the 1950's civil defence video!
Ghosts:
Out there somewhere in the internet wilderness is a tormented man. He is apparently haunted by the ghost of a girl. He has even tried to communicate with the ghost without much success, clearly because he is not haunted by a ghost girl. What he evidently has on his hands is a rat infestation and a serious case of break and enter by a girl who's watched too many Japanese horror films. If you're interested, there appear to be at least 41 videos of that ghost. (That's right. I said 41.)
Also out there is a tormented... make-up reviewer or something. What she claims from the title is a ghost caught on camera. What we actually get is about 2 minutes of explanation and then nothing, followed by a few seconds of a couple of things moving across the bench top, apparently of their own accord. Not once does any paranormal being manifest itself visually to be "caught on camera".
She might want to get that place checked out because there seems to be a pretty serious draught. Or maybe a bug or beetle walked across her bench. The preview picture on the YouTube search page even helpfully circles the wardrobe door behind the poor woman, in the part of the video that has absolutely nothing to do with the ghost.
(Side note: To give you an idea of just how much stuff like this is out there, these were literally the first two videos I watched on my latest search down the YouTube rabbit hole. I'm not kidding.)
If the invisible or the all-too-visible aren't your thing, perhaps you'd prefer a video showing a mysterious blue splodge on a security camera. I think this is one of those more famous cases of ghosts caught on tape, because there's a reporter there and everything. Only the audio on this video has been ripped out and replaced with some stupid music so when we first see the reporter talking into the security camera it just looks like a random idiot pretending to do a news report into a security camera.
Uhh, guys? This blurry splodge seems to have wings if you pay attention for more than a few seconds. Maybe it's, oh, I don't know, an out of focus bird or insect?
And then there's this. I have never seen more people become convinced of a ghostly presence by so little in my entire life.... Wait. Who sees three blankets on the floor, no sign of a break in, and decides to check hours of security footage to see what happened? Someone must really care about their blanket stacking.
Aliens and UFOs:
This video, whilst clearly faked, is actually faked a lot better than many of the other "real" alien encounters out there. What makes this particular video absolutely hilarious is the guy's reaction to the meteor hitting the ground nearby: give the camera to his fiancé and run towards the impact site like a madman! The title-card at the end is also a gross understatement, given they have been clearly attacked and eaten by an alien.
Now, with a video title like "Mexican UFO Caught on Tape! Octopus shaped" you'd expect a video showing an octopus shaped object floating around in the skies above Mexico, right? Wrong. These guys at least have the sanity to lean towards calling it fake, but it only takes 30 seconds to realise that it's probably the rear view of a military jet (which are known for being distinctly not octopus shaped).
You know what? I'm going to include one more, not because it causes you to lose faith in all of humanity (although some of the other videos in the channel certainly do), but because it has smooth jazz.
Time Travel (No, Really):
The answer to the question posed at the beginning of this video is clearly, "No. It's a folder."
Still. At least you all learnt the duck and cover technique.
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